Painful Restarts

If you’ve ever had to restart doing something after a while, you know the painful feeling I am referring to. And it comes in stages.

First, there’s the dread. Of having to climb that steep mountain all over again. That is then followed by estimating the time it will take to complete this goal – over and over again until it becomes the very thing that starts crippling you. Then comes the next day, when you’ve promised yourself that you will start today, because you know if you don’t, the next day will be even harder. But somehow, you manage to convince yourself it can’t be done today.

“The timing’s off”, “I woke up late”, “I have other urgent tasks”, “I can’t do it today, I have to catch up with people” and on and on the reasons pile up. And then the next day becomes even harder. This happens. To everyone. All the time. Sometimes, it is inevitable, and that’s completely fine, life happens. But being honest is key here. Did something really unavoidable come up which is why you couldn’t get going, or was it an excuse?
I gave myself an excuse. It happened to me, just yesterday, when I had content for a post ready, and managed to convince myself that I just wasn’t “feeling it” and didn’t post. And here I am today, writing another one. Along with this, I managed to convince myself to take 2 rest days while I was on a consistent streak, all because I felt that I should rest and “one day of rest won’t hurt” and that one day turned into two. I could’ve easily done something else, anything else, worked out muscle groups that weren’t in need of rest, but instead, I became lazy. Now here I am, dying of embarrassment. But here’s the thing: it doesn’t matter.

It Doesn’t Matter

“We suffer more in imagination than in reality.” – Seneca

I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t matter. Trust me, it really doesn’t matter. And “it” refers to the various reasons you have convinced yourself NOT to start or take action today. I promise you, nobody’s watching, judging, evaluating or wondering about your current actions, the path you’re on, the destinations they lead to, or any of these things that you’ve managed to convince yourself to delay the starting point or to continue the streak that you’ve built. Nobody’s going to question you on anything. Nobody cares. And that’s the most wonderful and freeing thing you can remember. Since nobody cares how many times you fail, how many times you stumble, how many times you lose your way and have to restart, it means you have that much more freedom to try things in a different way, pick things from where you’ve left them and keep going. It’s the best part about being unnoticed. Your failures are not accounted for, no matter how many times you fail. You can simply pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep going.

Inertia

Newton’s law of inertia is one we have heard of so many times. “An object will remain at rest or in motion unless acted upon by an external force.”
Most times in life, we don’t exactly have a choice of the external force. A simple example is the need for good grades while you are a student. The external force could be any number of things, such as landing a good job, parental expectations, self-esteem, etc. The same can be said for almost any situation you are in. However, when it comes to goals that we’ve set for ourselves, things become a little more difficult.
It becomes too easy to become complacent. You can convince yourself to rest, or to start the next day, or any excuse that fits your narrative to delay the task at hand. Not only that, the delay then results in some form of regret or guilt that you manage to carry with you, promising yourself you will never feel this way again, but starting again the next day becomes that much harder. What now? It feels like an endless loop.

Apply the law of inertia. What will get you moving? I use something that usually strikes me emotionally, as that’s the easiest way to get myself moving. This could be a positive or negative emotion. For instance, if I convince myself to not work out, I either listen to a song that has lyrics that get me moving, or remember a poem that will get me to work out, which in turn make me feel positive and motivated. Sometimes, this doesn’t do the trick. So I do the opposite: I think of something I never want to feel again. I look back at a picture from a year ago when I wasn’t in shape and felt out of breath just walking up stairs. Immediately, I realise I never want to feel that way again, and that gets me moving.

The goal in the end, is to get yourself doing what you need to do, regardless of the time, day, or whatever excuse you give yourself. Discipline to follow through with this, will happen as you build this habit of showing up everyday. And initially, that’s the goal. It doesn’t matter how you show up. It just matters that you do, and once you show up, to give your best. The longer you do this, the better you get at it.

Note to self: As I write this, I realise just how easy it is to get started. So I won’t be cutting myself any slack anytime soon. And if I do feel like “resting”, then I’ll simply apply these very remedies I’ve written.